Someday you will know

Hello world！

liyujiaeva2 — Tue, 12 Oct 2010 01:09:06 +0000

Welcome to WordPress.com. This is your first post. Edit or delete it and start blogging!

窘。。。

liyujiaeva2 — Wed, 14 Apr 2010 03:03:26 +0000

近两星期学分裂症，觉得分裂症很难理解。可是发生些窘事后，觉得有的窘人比有分裂症的人更不能理解。

我一直告诉自己不能讨厌任何人，因为任何人的任何性格都是因为很多原因形成的。如果有同样的经历，也许大部分人都会变成这个样子。可是想是这么想，真的遇到窘的人，不讨厌是很难的。除非把他看成精神病人，精神病人做什么我都能耐心面对了。

这篇写的语言伦乱，缺乏逻辑性，跟分裂症有一拼。

Some random random research idea

liyujiaeva2 — Mon, 29 Mar 2010 19:52:47 +0000

Whenever I read and psych research, I always have the same
question, how do we know that what the participants report is true?
Participants can easily be bored by the questionnaire and skip questions, be in
time constraint and rush through the report, or simply do not feel like telling
the truth. How do we account for their results? I am, of course, not the only
one who is concerned with this problem. There are many criticism that question
the validity of psychological research, which uses interviews, questionnaires,
observations and other research methods that are involves too much subjective
judgment and give rise to suspicion.

The research that I am involved in right now is susceptible
to this question of validity. Participants have to recall a story. When I code
their recall, I cannot suppress the feeling that some people just did not take
the study seriously. They stop at awkward endings, skip important episodes, or
recalled way too little. I am not sure that I can trust that all of them used
their most effort to do the recalling task. Having this concern, I thought of a
way that might help. What if we ask the participants to sign an honor code that
says that they would recall to their best ability and that everything they
write are their true memory? Would an honor code serve as a judge who stops the
participants from rushing over a study? I thought of another way, which is to
control the time of recall. We can make sure that the participants have to stay
in the computer room for half an hour to do the task. They can take longer if
they want, but to leave early is not allowed. The participants would have no
reason for rushing over a study because they have to take the half an hour.

We can study whether participants will give longer recalls
if we make them stay in the lab for a certain amount of time. The control group
would leave when they are finished, but the experimental group has to stay for
at least half an hour before they can leave. Half an hour is longer than the
average length of recall.

I predict that the honor code group and the group that is
required to take more time will give longer and more accurate recalls.

This study will have implications on how to improve the
quality of participants’ self-report data. We can further extrapolate the question
whether honor code really works.

Why do we need women’s college

liyujiaeva2 — Sun, 28 Mar 2010 18:25:42 +0000

A women’s college creates an environment that is clear of distractions for girls to become career-oriented women . MHC is the ideal women’s college. First and foremost, there are no boys. Boys are the No.1 distraction for girls in college. They make girls party, dress up and put on make up, and dream about marrying a good man and become housewives. In a women’s college, girls don’t worry about those. Secondly, the campus is embedded in the mountains. There is one trip to a shopping mall every week, for which you have to hurry to get the ticket before it is sold out. And you know what? You don’t have to buy nice clothes anyway, because there are plenty of girls who wear sweatshirts, pajamas and flip flops. You don’t have to worry about competition of who looks better than others.Why not get a bunch MHC shirts, pants and flip flops from the campus store and use them everyday? Third, all the girls are double or triple majors. If you do not take five or more classes a semester, feel bad about yourself. You are a slacker. There are enough peer pressure for you to work hard.

No distractions, in the middle of nowhere, and lots of peer pressure. At this place, you don’t think about getting married or dress up nicely. What else do you do except for studying and pursuing a career which seems to be the only way out? This is the philosophy of a women’s college, and MHC is the ideal model of a women’s college.

…

liyujiaeva2 — Sun, 28 Mar 2010 04:48:54 +0000

I used to be afraid of going to phD program, and stay in the US for my whole life. After talking to other people, I figure that it is tough to live in China,too. Plus, I am the type of person that will make life tough no matter what the
circumstances are. So it doesn’t matter where I am. Just have too keep up to challenges.

焦虑过后，还是得过

liyujiaeva2 — Wed, 17 Mar 2010 05:17:58 +0000

从回学校后一直被对未来的规划苦恼，偶尔烦到睡不着的程度。另一方面又发现学习没有动力。大概是在大山里憋了三年，伤感到极限了。开学的一阵子除了
上课不碰书本一下，reading和作业都成了笑话，还有一次考试都忘记了。有几天我就想着，是不是休学一阵子比较好，回家找个餐馆端盘子吧，或者找家商
店做推销员。哪都行，总之不能在山里再待下去了。然后就开始幻想出去打工的情景。白天在家普通的首饰店，晚上笑眯眯的把pizza端给客人，打样的时候擦
桌子，拖地，算账。交几个小姐妹，每天闹哄哄的在一起，去打折的商店淘货。拿到很薄的工资单就上街买便宜的衣服，过几天小生活。很不起眼的理想，只是从来
没有实践。下次有时间做这样的事，大概是找不到工作回家待业的时候吧。如果继续读书，十几年内大概不会回家了。

懒惰了一段时间后,感觉
midterm迫近,只好没日没夜的赶作业.在图书馆待到关门的几个星期里,发现有时侯写作业也是一种排解，或者说更是一种逃避烦恼的方法。当巨多的作业
堆在面前的时候，一种巨大的力量让你的精力无比的集中，杂念们顿时全废了。什么烦恼，全都没有眼前的作业重要。某天感觉不顺畅的时候就产生了“去图书馆做
十几张数据发泄一下”的念头。图书馆是个好地方～

继续用作业排解，只是无穷无尽的作业中逃不掉的还是空虚的感觉。每天上课、作业、在大山里
读书，以后到底要做什么。离开太久外面的生活太久，显得那么遥远。就好象在女校久了，又想读书，对能嫁出去便不再幻想。离开学校以后就要启程吗，一段完整
的人生要自己规划，一步步向下走吗。

面对未来的焦虑逃不掉，日子还是一样的飘过。大山，灰蒙蒙的雨天，图书馆，single
room，在这个迷茫的时间，在一堆对过去的眷恋，对现在的空虚，和对未来的空想中一个人飘过～

P.S今天出去吃饭，waiter端来一灌
子水，对面的某人拿起水罐帮我倒，才反应过来这是在国内吃饭时候的习惯，代表这个文化中独有的谦逊和尊重，顿时感动～认真地谢谢某人。用咱MHC姐妹们的
话说，“太有爱了～”

这两天

liyujiaeva2 — Sat, 12 Dec 2009 02:19:06 +0000

憋不住了想说，就算很不文明，也不管了。这几天的life真的很shitty。今天头脑嗡嗡叫了一整天，因为昨天写一篇作文一直写到4点，软磨硬泡也不想再看它一眼了，但是还是在泪与痛中BS出来了，里面定是语法错误连篇，awakward sentence成群，看到老师吐血的sxxt。可怜的老师还特别敏感语言问题，就要被我的作文折磨到四了。本来给小朋友们做project是件很有成就感的事情，可是这鬼课偏偏一个星期6个小时的Lab，每次上lab都要些一大堆的observation report。偶又偏偏特罗索，写到小朋友们的行为就抓不住重点全盘记下，搞得本学期呕心沥血地BS了40几页的report和30几页的分析，虽然全是废话，还有大大小小的作业都10页10页的交，可怜的老师就这样被我虐死了，可怜的小朋友估计也被我盯得发抖了吧。这样写下来，现在看到这门课的任何东西都感觉头脑要爆炸，两腿要发软，精神要崩溃了。就在偶睡眠不足精神崩溃大脑抽痉上周 (其实就是昨天，可是往事不堪回首，痛苦会自动过滤掉，所以仿佛事隔已久了。。。），偶被亲爱的盖尔同学（教授）深深的数落和打击了。偶一走进办公室她就说我appointment没有按规据定，她有很多学生，言下之意没时间接待。我说好吧那我们就快谈。然后她就开始质疑偶的research，问偶有没有找到导师啊，偶说没有，然后她又数落偶说你又没学过这个实验方法，research怎么做，她刚教过一节课可是我又没上云云。偶心说TNND，你连调查背景都没听，怎么知道该用什么调查方法，还有偶要是已经找到导师了，还来找你干嘛，不就是因为不知道这个research该怎么做所以才来找您老人家的么，您怎么连半句话都不听我说就开始批判了呢？着难怪上您的课的时候您不交试验方法，只教how to critize a method云云。被她一说，感觉好像没戏了，记得去年暑假的research就是被这个witch of critical thinking扼杀了，这次才不会被你再度扼杀，偶一定要继续努力

然后就是到lab做实验，把people带到电脑室里做survey，看悲惨的背叛故事，回忆惨痛的过去，写下回忆。没有人哭着走出实验室。如果有也不错。实验完感觉脑袋非常地痛，去了heath center，结果拿药的时候卡却刷不出来，在phone上折腾了半个小时还是没有钱，只好熬了一晚上，edggy like mad，shitty到家，还写那片小朋友的报告写到4点。早上8点钟起床，睡得效率出奇地高，然后在凛冽的寒风中交作业，交表，拿药，去SGA office做帐。接到伟大的主席mariam同学的来信说你你必须两点半在H帮忙set up，头脑已经嗡嗡叫了一天了，崩溃也来不及了，不能被这种事情吓倒。去还是要去的，但是先让偶好好吃一顿吧，毕竟人是铁饭是钢，candy bar是个大汽缸，不能假以度日，然后就去了“明月轩”。在这麻省荒凉的乡村，中国饭就是石油，天然气，可以把人变成变形金刚，吃了精神倍爽。然后去H受mariam的领导服务大众，领yale的身残志坚同学去厕所= =。5点钟逃离H,在图书馆坐台，坐完台偶说真的不行了，坚决不能再服务大众了，畏缩地逃走，晚餐，回家洗澡，坐在软软的床上不住地发牢骚。。。

才发现，其实偶很韶

liyujiaeva2 — Tue, 22 Sep 2009 05:26:54 +0000

本学期第一篇无关紧要的报告，即没有规定字数，也没有和期末论文太大的关系，结果我一天内就洋洋洒洒诹了9页，真是有够傻啊，智商根三岁小孩差不多了。原来偶平时金口难开，是因为全发泄在纸上了哈。说得少了憋得难过，自然写东西的时候会比较罗嗦了。亲爱的professor们就请你们包容下吧~

带小孩日记

liyujiaeva2 — Wed, 16 Sep 2009 20:55:56 +0000

这几天老是心烦，本来想找advisor问些问题，她跟我改期了。因为这些问题让我很困扰，所以被推迟了就有点freak out。今天带孩子的时候幼儿园老师说了几句话，非常有要害。

有个小孩总喜欢粘着我，讲好多他想象的故事，讲的还挺有想象力，我也就听着。下课的时候老师跟我说这种时候不用老依着他，应该跟他说"I have to do other things, and you need to wait. Why don’t you play with other kids?" 老师解释说这个小孩是独生，所以总是有妈妈陪他，听他讲故事，他也就习惯了有人关注，但是 "In adult life, we have to wait a lot."

我感觉说得还蛮有道理的。愿望不能实现的时候很需要忍耐的毅力。现在总是选不到课、找不到导师、约不到逛街的朋友，这个时候只有坚持，带着目的的等待，除此之外别无他法。有时生活中就是无尽的等待。

法拉盛小记

liyujiaeva2 — Sun, 09 Aug 2009 04:22:57 +0000

偶现在住在传说中的法拉盛，这里是纽约皇后区的华人聚集地，一个相当神奇甚至有些雷人的地方。超市里便宜的中国货应有尽有，大街上一大半都是华人，周末商业街上的辣妹看上去很像上海的风格。但是也不完全是中国的感觉，中国人的生活还是很纽约。这里有Ivy Day School (常春藤幼儿园)，Tops SAT补习班，星期天的早上路边有老奶奶发教会的传单。这些华人在纽约用独特的方式找到了舒适的生活。

最近在家没事的时候就自己捉摸着怎么弄吃的，学会了不少。自己做饭真是一件幸福的事情~